All Things Lesbian

Exclusive Lesbian Relationships - Are They Right For You?

What is an exclusive relationship and do you want to be in one? Being in an exclusive relationship usually means that you are only dating each other and nobody else. When people initially start dating, it is quite common for them to date a number of people at the same time. In fact, this type of dating is sometimes actively encouraged as it is a quick and easy way to try out a number of different potential partners.

But casual dating has its limits. You cannot form a long lasting relationship with someone you only see on a Wednesday night! It can be difficult to make the transition from casual dating to a defined, exclusive, relationship. It means showing your feelings to the other person and you may be concerned that you will scare her off. But it is vitally important to communicate your feelings and expectations. You never know, but she may feel exactly the same way!

There may be signs that your partner is also keen to move things onto a more exclusive basis. Is she looking to spend more time with you? If you suggest an evening out on a particular day, is she generally available? You could try finding out whether she is seeing other people by asking her straight out. If this is too direct for you, then try teasing her about having too many dates to deal with and look closely at how she responds both by what she says and her non verbal language.

All relationships thrive through open and honest communication, even if it is difficult. If you don’t discuss how you are feeling and what you would like to have happen but simply rely on assumptions it can lead to deep hurt later on down the road.

Your partner cannot be expected to read your mind. She may believe that you are the one who wants to keep things casual and that you are dating other people too. If you don’t discuss it, how can you know what the other wants?

Obviously if she has just come out of a serious relationship and keeps making remarks about people getting tied down too quickly, etc., that is a fairly good sign that she does NOT want an exclusive partnership and is happier playing the field.

The bottom line is that you will just have to suck it up and bring the conversation out into the open at some point after a number of successful dates with your new woman. It can be a scary proposition, but it’s necessary to ensure that you are both on the same page in your relationship.

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